Fall Schedules

*** I discovered this blog post that I wrote two years ago. I remember those days, those struggles, the closeness with God. Today, as I hover around the bathroom, I'm thankful for the lack of nausea. I'm thankful that my calendar will not include chemo trips and sadness over missing out because of the side effects. I've come along way since 2012, and for that, I feel blessed.****


As I was recording Nathan and Ben's soccer games in my calendar, turning to October, I realized that I'll be done with chemo by then! I'll probably miss a couple games in September because of the way they fall after my treatment, but I'll be able to make it to most of their games. I can't wait!

At my Herceptin infusion on Thursday, I met a lady named Linda, too. She was about 15-20 years older than I. We were chatting with the nurse, whose mom was also named Linda, about the popularity of that name during our growing up years. I mentioned how I always had to use my last initial during school because I had at least one other Linda in class every year. The nurse said her mom used her middle name mostly. I wonder if Linda will ever come around to be popular as a name again...

As I was talking with Linda, she mentioned that she didn't suffer from nausea after her chemo treatments. She is on the same treatment schedule as I am, the same drugs, but the only side effect she has experienced so far is fatigue and a little bit of GI discomfort. I can't imagine what it would be like to not have the debilitating nausea, the food adversions, the need to force my body back into the hospital for fluids on Monday. Linda said Monday is her hardest day because she feels the most tired. She probably doesn't even realize how good she has it.

Even though I hate the side effects I've had to endure, I do appreciate the closeness I've felt with God during my hardest times. When I'm busy and life is good, God gets His allotted time in my schedule every day, but not much more. Now, when I can't sleep, I cherish the extra time to talk things over with Him.  It seems like every verse I read in the Bible is the exact verse I need for what I'm going through. I know He holds each of  my tears in His hands. He is there beside me as I suffer and celebrates with me as I recover. I don't feel strong enough to be called to this, but I think that's the place He wants me to be. He is strong enough and He has a purpose for this. And that's more than enough for me.

I've been thinking of this verse this week:

The Lord your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

I love the image of God rejoicing over me with singing!